As we mark Lesbian Visibility Week, Hollie Davies-Lees, a third-year physiotherapy student at Keele University and CSP Student Rep, reflects on the quiet hesitation that still shapes how she connects and shares more about herself with peers.
For me and my partner, being a lesbian couple in education and on placement isn’t just about being ‘out’, it’s about constantly weighing up whether it feels safe to be.
There’s often a small pause before one of us says something as simple as ‘my partner’ or uses ‘she’ in conversation. It’s rarely a big, deliberate decision, more a quick internal evaluation: who’s around, what’s the environment like, and is it worth correcting assumptions. It’s something we’ve both become used to, almost without realising.
Even at university, around other students, it doesn’t always feel as comfortable as people might expect. There are still moments where we hesitate and think twice before saying something. While conversations can feel natural at times, that underlying awareness never fully disappears.
In more formal situations, such as with lecturers or people we don’t know as well, that feeling becomes more noticeable. We’ve both realised that we rarely talk about each other in those settings. It’s not something we’ve consciously decided, but more an unspoken understanding. Those environments can feel more formal, less familiar, and sometimes harder to read, so it often feels easier to keep that part of our lives to ourselves.
On placement, that awareness becomes even stronger. You’re already trying to learn, adapt, and make a good impression in a completely new environment. Bringing your personal life into that, especially when you’re unsure how it will be received, can feel like a risk. Because of that, we often choose not to share, not because we want to hide who we are, but because we’re mindful of the potential responses and the impact they could have.
That constant awareness can be tiring. It sits quietly in the background, something to carry alongside everything else.
What really stands out are the moments where that weight isn’t there, where no assumptions are made, where inclusive language is used, and where being ourselves doesn’t feel like something we have to manage.
For me, visibility isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s found in those small, everyday decisions and in how much easier those decisions could feel if every space felt genuinely inclusive.
It isn’t just about being seen, it’s about finally feeling like you don’t have to think twice.
To connect with the CSP LGBTQIA+ community and access peer support, join the CSP LGBTQIA+ network.
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